August 31, 2011

Anti-Depressant Independence Week 2

Today I took the next step towards independence.  I'm down to a 1/2 dose, from where I started, as of this morning.  It's kind of exciting.

So far, so good.

I have experienced a few "withdrawal" symptoms.  I was a bit shaky the first few days of "cutting down" but it got better as the week went on.  My equilibrium seems to be slightly off (a little dizzy and lightheaded) and I'm a bit nauseous at times (or at least I have a few food nasty chocolate flavored Calcium chews for one...yuck).  It's almost like I am in my first trimester of pregnancy (no, this is NOT an announcement) but very very mildly so.  It's been very "doable" so far. 

Emotionally, hormonally, chemically--whatever you want to call it--I feel fine.  In fact, even better than where I was a few weeks ago.  The other day...I felt like "me" again.  Just an over all good feeling of...well...good feelings. 

It's been just over 2 weeks since I started taking the right (aka best) from of methylfolate again.  I wonder if that has anything to do with it.  I, personally, believe it has a lot, if not everything, to do with it but I like to keep my statements open (instead of coming across as some MTHFR fanatic--even though I just might be...he he he).  Otherwise I would have said something like..."I KNOW it is the methylfolate...I KNOW it."

Maybe it is...maybe it isn't.  All I know is that I feel better now that I am taking it again and I'm cool with that....very cool with that.

Yesterday I had to fight off the melancholy and overwhelm-ed-ness (yes, I like to make up my own words) of a stressful day (first day of school, checkbook balancing, a bazillion loads of laundry to do (that I didn't get done) , empty cupboards with no money left to fill them...ugh).  But told my husband that it made me feel empowered because I WAS ABLE to fight it (told you I wouldn't go down without a fight).

I had the strength to pull myself out of my little pity party.  When my minds started to work 1,000 miles a minute with things to do, places to be, purchases to make (or more accurately purchases I can't make that I need to make because of an end-of-the-month-no-money-left-in-the-budget thing), and my failings as a human being, because I can't control all of life's situations and fix the world and keep myself from spending half of my food budget on candy, etc...., I was able to stop "the gerbil in the brain wheel" (who must have been on some sort of accelerant, I swear) and concentrate on what was REALLY important in THAT moment. thing at a time.

This is big in the "coping" department for me.  Life is stressful...Stress is a ever living fact of life.  It's how we DEAL with the stress that makes the difference, right?  I'll take it.

I am still struggling with some "brain fogginess" (I hate feeling "slow").  It had been progressively getting worse over the last few months but now (after starting the right methylfoate again) seems to be slowly clearing up.  

He he may be a MTHFR/methylfolate fanatic if......

Anyhow...while we are talking about MTHFR fanaticism, I have a funny story.

My husband thinks it it hilarious to hear me "preach" MTHFR and methylfolate.  He says it sounds like a "miracle cure" for everything.  Which, of course,  it is SO not...but since Folic Acid is really important for a lot of body functions, it can help fix a lot of problems when you are getting the right amount, right?  RIGHT? he teases me that at the end of my "speeches" I should tell women that it will increase their bust by 2 cup sizes.  His reasoning?  "It seems to do everything else".  (If only it were so.  Wouldn't that be nice.)  Then I am forced to remind him that anyone looking at me, with my completely flat chest, would know that it was a lie and all my credibility would go out the door.   We did try it out on a group of his cousins at a family reunion this summer, though.  We had one of them going for a quite a while.  It was great.

Good Times....sigh....

I'll keep you posted......

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Grumpy Grateful Mom said...

Increased bust size? I'm in! Glad you are progressing. Continual prayers for you. :)

Me said...

Awesome news and congrats to you so far. I agree- the stopping the gerbil wheel and breathing, being in the moment, etc. has helped me tremendously as well. I have so much to write about but AAAHHH zero time (reference your own "to do lists" deadlines so I can make some money to fill said cabinets myself.) As for me, I am officially a MTHFR fanatic and tell everyone about it. My 7 year old son takes it, my husband, and my sister and mom (hey, depression's genetic!) are getting some. It's A-MAZING the difference I feel. Life is still absolutely nuts and of course we all lose it sometimes, but I'll take that sometimes above always being lost :)

The Larsen Gang said...

Hang in there are doing great!!!

Robert Millward said...

I might take this supplement up myself. I will pass on the bust size increase however.

Do keep up this huge effort and I hope that the fight alone brings benefits.

G'pa Bob

Kara said...

Everytime I see your acronym MTHFR I think of a swear word.

Just laugh with me.

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